EDIT: i wasn't aware of this at the time of my post, but let it be known that Dan Savage has a history of transphobia. Do what you will with this information.
"Anyone who tells you that making time for joy — however you define it — is a distraction or a betrayal has no idea what they’re talking about. During the darkest days of the AIDS Crisis, we buried our friends in the morning, we protested in the afternoon, and we danced at night. The dance kept us in the fight because it was the dance we were fighting for. It didn’t look like we were going to win then and we did. It doesn’t feel like we’re going to win now but we could. Keep fighting, keep dancing."
-- Dan Savage
@sterophonick we don’t deserve Dan.
@sterophonick What I'll do with it is add a spot donation to https://translifeline.org/. Thanks for sharing both the quote (which I still find edifying), and the context on Dan Savage which I wasn't aware of.
@sterophonick “The dance kept us in the fight because it was the dance we were fighting for.”
Isn't this the rationale behind funerals in New Orleans, where you have the Dirge and the second line to remind everyone to celebrate life?
@CaffeinatedBookDragon i have friends who tell me their tradition is to party hard
When my dad passed, we didn't have a service, but a loose gathering where folks could drop in and leave if they had work or say a few words at the mic. He wasn't religious (indifferent to it at best) and I was agnostic, so getting some preacher who never met him to try and say a few words about him in a service was just not happening.
Some of his work buddies from back in the day (and even some who barely knew him) were there using the funeral as an excuse to skip work (he would've approved because it was hot as hell in July and he'd climbed phone poles and dug ditches in that same heat for decades--hee hee).
I just had them put The Dark Side of the Moon album on in the background on repeat til it was over, his fave album. Some solemnity & crying but the mood lightened over time. It was better than other funerals I'd been to that were so strict & solemn. Guess it was more of a memorial than a true funeral, but it worked out fine. He wasn't sentimental, anyway.