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"i must post a banger i must post a banger"

i go to the thought creation machine, a massive rusted mechanism in the center of the town and kick it, it goes into action! for a second. before dying again.
i attempt to go to the library of thoughts, a grand marble building painted in pastel colours, closed. not well funded enough to stay running all the time.
i look at the cafe in the town, surely they will supply me with the caffeine needed to get the machine running, a guard named "My Better Judgement" stands like a statue in front of the entrance. I must not disobey them.
i sit on the stairs of the cafe, a storm named Eepyness is brewing, as all hope is lost something approaches and begins to lick my hand, my saviour.

"Uni...."

"please... :3 call me big boobs :3"